Insecurities
by CenationUCME
Summary: John has some niggling insecurities, plaguing his mind and Randy is determined to find out. Will both men come dangerously close to losing each other when emotions rise? CENTON SLASH John/Randy Rated M One Shot


**Thank you guys so much for supporting me through this, I am truly amazed at all the well wishes I received and very grateful. I am starting a new treatment for the cancer soon that will hopefully be less disappointing then the last!**

**Anyways, enough about me, here is a one shot (or maybe a two shot) that I have been working on for a few days. I hope you like! **

John frowned as he took one final check in the mirror, adjusting his shirt for the tenth time so he would look perfect for his boyfriend tonight. Randy was taking his long term boyfriend out to dinner for a nice romantic meal, something they had not done in a while, because of John's hectic WWE schedule. Randy was not in their shared hotel room tonight as he had a late signing, but promised to pick John up for their date at 8.00, which was just about now.

John sighed as he stared at himself in the mirror. While Randy constantly praised him of his beauty, he was starting to get uncertain. His 35th birthday was only last month and in his mind, he had aged quite a bit. He had dark circles from the lack of sleep he had received and he noticed the faded lines around his eyes, indicating fresh wrinkles. He jumped as he heard a knock at the door, snapping himself out of his saddening thoughts. He took one final check in the mirror, sighing at his reflection, before grabbing his phone and opening the door.

He gasped as he opened the door, only to stare into the face of a true angel like creature. Randy was leaning on the door and in John's eyes, looked completely stunning. He was dressed in dark jeans and a black shirt that perfectly complimented his skin colour and they hugged to his body, showing some skin underneath that John longed to feel, despite the numerous times he had seen him naked. Randy had his usual cocky smirk across his face that further flattered his tan skin. John's mouth opened and closed shaking himself out of his thoughts as he heard his lover's voice,

"Like what you see, baby?" Randy purred, his smirk growing wider.

John's mouth opened but no words came out. Randy chuckled, amused that his normally talkative lover was lost for words.

"You look beautiful tonight, as always, darling," Randy spoke softly, taking in John's appearance, "Absolutely stunning, my baby boy."

John blushed beetroot red, "Thank you Ran," he whispered, "You look very handsome too."

Randy smiled and grabbed John's hand. "C'mon, our restaurant reservation is waiting for us."

John squeezed his boyfriend's hand tightly as he was led down the hotel floor, for a night of fun and pleasure with his one true love, his earlier insecurities lost in the back of his mind.

"I'll have the lobster special, please," John said, flashing his dimples at the waitress.

"I'll have the same, with a side of salad," Randy piped in, rolling his eyes at the way the waitress was giggling at John.

"Sure thing, Mr Cena. Coming right up," chirped the waitress, "And you too, of course," she added quickly nodding to Randy, before walking off.

"She could at least have the decency not to drool all over you when I am right here! I'm obviously on a date with my man," Randy voiced his opinion, annoyed. "I mean, what a slut. Who even does that anymore?"

Randy looked over at John, who was staring absentmindedly at the wall. "Uhhh, Johnny? Are you listening to me?" asked Randy, frowning at his boyfriend's behaviour.

John jumped at Randy's voice and quickly shuffled around nervously. "Yeah, sure Randy. Of course I am." He smiled, his lips spreading, though not quite reaching his eyes.

"Look, John, if you do not want to be here, that is fine," said Randy, "We can leave right now and head back to the hotel if that is what you want."

"No, no of course I want to be here." John exclaimed, leaning over and pecking his partner on the lips.

Randy narrowed his eyes at him, not entirely convinced, but he let it go, knowing that John would come to him whenever he was ready to say what was on his mind.

The rest of the date went on in the same fashion, Randy doing most of the talking, while John just nodded and smiled, deep in his own thoughts. Randy racked his brains, wondering if it was him that had maybe upset his lover and reviewed the day's events over and over in his head.

John, on the other hand, was thinking about his physical features, seeing nothing but old, decrepit wrinkles and blemishes and wondering why the hell, someone as hot as Randy was still with him. No matter how much he shook himself out of his thoughts, desperately trying to listen to the conversation that Randy was having with him, his mind kept wondering back to his insecurities.

Randy eventually got tired of having a conversation with himself and paid for their meal, before heading back to the car with John. The ride home was both silent and awkward, as the men were deep in thought, each trying to solve their dilemma.

Randy heaved a sigh, listening to the sound of running water in the bathroom. After they had returned to the hotel room for the night, Randy had showered and got into bed, while John went for his bath. He was currently trying to read a book, but his mind kept wondering back to the peculiarity of John's behaviour. In all the years he had been with his lover, John had always come to him when he was upset, pouring out his heart and soul. He hoped that, this time, it was not something serious and John would speak to him eventually.

"Someone is thinking deeply," remarked John, grinning, as he walked out of the bathroom, wiping the remaining water off his body.

"I think we have both been doing a lot of that tonight," Randy remarked, shortly and dryly.

He was met with stubborn silence from his partner and Randy groaned inwardly, knowing he would have to force out John's problem himself.

"John, we need to talk," Randy spoke short and briskly, finally having enough of his lovers' evening antics.

"About what, sweetie?" John smiled innocently as he pulled on his boxer shorts.

Randy patted the bed next to him, gesturing for John to sit down. John grinned and flew onto the bed, landing onto Randy as he shuffled around trying to get comfortable in his boyfriends lap. Randy laughed at his cute behaviour and sat against the bedframe with John in his lap hoping to talk some sense into his partner.

"Now, John, can you please tell me what is wrong with you tonight?" As John opened his mouth, Randy added, "And don't pretend it is nothing because I KNOW you."

John sighed as he cuddled deeper into Randy's chest, drawing random patterns through the younger man's tattoos. "I don't know what you are talking about."

"Don't lie to me John!" Randy's voice rose as he tried to control his anger and he pushed John away from him. "Just fucking tell me, because I am sick and tired of how you have been acting all day. You are really starting to piss me off!"

"I told you that it is nothing!" John shouted at him, "What else do you want me to say for fuck's sake?"

"How about the truth?" Randy argued back, "You know what forget it, you will always act like this so what is the point?"

John narrowed his eyes at him, dangerously. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that, what is the point in even trying to talk to you about it because you are lousy at opening up about your feelings and you are lousy at being a boyfriend!" Randy yelled, his rage finally getting the better of him.

John's eyes filled with furious tears at his boyfriend's last sentence. Normally, their fights would not last long and they would make up in no time but Randy had never said anything so hurtful before. John stood there for a second, as hot tears rolled down his cheeks and with a loud sob; he flew into the bathroom locking the door behind him.

Randy sank down onto the bed, his own words finally sinking in. He had hurt his lover quite badly and that was not something he wanted to do. He just wanted John to open up to him and his temper had ruined everything. He hoped dearly that he could persuade John to forgive him and a silent tear moved down his cheek as the cruel evening finally took its toll on both men.

**So I hope you liked that! Quite a bit of angst and If you guys would like to see the sequel to this, Id be happy to write one! Please review and tell me how I did! Thank you! Love you all! I appreciate and read every single review! **

**Thank you for taking the time! Hope to update soon!**


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